Funny Jokes Collection at prettyjokes.com
1. Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.
2. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.
3. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.
4. The average person’s left hand does 56% of the
typing.
5. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both
eyes.
6. There are more chickens than people in the world.
7. Two-thirds of the world’s eggplant is grown in New
Jersey.
8. The longest one-syllable word in the English language
is “screeched.”
9. On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over
the Parliament building is an American flag.
10. All of the clocks in the movie “Pulp Fiction” are
stuck on 4:20.
11. No word in the English language rhymes with month,
orange, silver, or purple.
12. “Dreamt” is the only English word that ends in the
letters “mt”.
13. All 50 states are listed across the top of the
Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.
14. Almonds are a member of the peach family.
15. Winston Churchill was born in a ladies’ room during
a dance.
16. Maine is the only state whose name is just one
syllable.
17. There are only four words in the English language
which end in “dous”:
tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.
18. Los Angeles’ full name is “El Pueblo de Nuestra
Senora la Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula”
19. A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.
20. An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.
21. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.
22. In most advertisements, the time displayed on a
watch is 10:10.
23. Al Capone’s business card said he was a used
furniture dealer.
24. The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were
named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank
Capra’s “It’s a Wonderful Life.”
25. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.
26. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
27. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.
28. It’s impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
29. The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.
30. In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed
to speak.
31. The microwave was invented after a researcher walked
by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.
32. Mr. Rogers is an ordained minister.
33. The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
34. There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.
35. “Stewardesses” is the longest word that is typed
with only the left hand.
36. If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would
have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
37. If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas
is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
38. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt
blood 30 feet.
39. Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
40. Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for
pleasure.
41. On average people fear spiders more than they do death.
42. The strongest muscle in the body is the TONGUE.
43. It’s impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
44. You can’t kill yourself by holding your breath.
45. Americans on the average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.
46. Every time you lick a stamp, you’re consuming 1/10 of a calorie.
47. Did you know that you are more likely to be killed by a
champagne cork than by a poisonous spider?
48. Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than
left-handed people do.
49. In ancient Egypt, Priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies,
including their eyebrows and eyelashes.
50. A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.
51. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
52. The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times
its own weight and always falls over on its right side when
intoxicated.
53. Polar bears are left handed.
54. The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds, that makes the catfish
rank #1 for animal having the most taste buds.
55. The flea can jump 350 times its body length, that is like a
human jumping the length of a football field.
56. A cockroach will live nine days without it’s head, before it
starves to death.
57. The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is
attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the
males head off.
58. Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
59. Butterflies taste with their feet.
60. Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump. (thankfully)
61. A cat’s urine glows under a blacklight.
62. An ostrich’s eye is bigger than it’s brain.
63. Starfishes haven’t got brains.
…now you know everything….You could be a
TEENAGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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