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Archive for the ‘Clinton Jokes’ Category


Bill’s Saxophone

Aug 27, 2005 Author: webmaster | Filed under: Clinton Jokes

Why did bill quit playing the saxophone?

To play his WhoreMonica

Bill Clinton & the Genie

Aug 27, 2005 Author: webmaster | Filed under: Clinton Jokes

One day Bill Clinton was walking down the beach when he found a genie lamp. He rubbed it and a genie came out. He said to Bill “You have one wish.”

Bill Clinton cried “But I thought you were supposed to have three wishes!” “Well you are the most powerful man in the world so I only allow one for you,” replied the Genie.

Bill Clinton thought hard and said “Bring peace to the middle east.” He took out a map to show the Genie.

The genie said “Nope. Can’t do that choose another wish.” This next wish came up right away.

“I want the WHOLE world to love Monica Lewinsky as much as I do” The Genie stared at him with a raised an eyebrow. The Genie replied quickly “Um…can I take a look at that map again?”

Bill Clinton’s Song

Aug 27, 2005 Author: webmaster | Filed under: Clinton Jokes

Bill’s Song

This should be sung to the tune “A Few of My Favorite Things” from the movie “The Sound of Music”

The Bill Clinton version:

My Favorite Things

Blow jobs and land deals in backwater places, Big Macs and french fries and girls with big faces, Lots of nice cleavage that makes willie spring, These are a few of my favorite things

Susan McDougal and Gennifer Flowers, Horny young interns who while ‘way the hours, Profits from futures that Hillary brings, These are a few of my favorite things

When that Jones bites, When Ken Starr stings, When I’m feeling sad, I simply remember my favorite things, And then I don’t feel so bad

Beating the draft board and getting elected, Naming to judgeships some hacks I’ve selected, Conspiracy theories that blame the right wing, These are a few of my favorite things

Golfing with Vernon and suborning perjury, Falling down drunk that required knee surgery Stars in the White House who come here to sing, These are a few of my favorite things

Meeting with Boris and Helmut and Tony, States of the Union with lots of baloney, Winning debates and the joy of my flings, These are a few of my favorite things