Three Little Pigs walked into a resterant one day.The Waiter asked them what they wanted for Dinner. The first Piggy said i want that steak please.The second piggy said i want pasta and the third piggy said i want water lots and lots of water.
The meal was served and a while later the waiter asked if the piggys wanted any derset. i wan the banana spilt said the first piggy. i want the apple pie said the second piggy. i want water lots and lots of water said the third piggy. the derset was served and a moment later the waiter asked the third little piggy: Why have you only orded Water all day?
Well someone has to go wee wee wee all the way home.

A little girl was diligently pounding away on her father’s word processor.
She told him she was writing a story. “What’s it about?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” she replied. “I can’t read.”

tis man walks in to a dinner and says can i use your bathroom the man says yes let me show you where thay are the man say ok and they to he back of the dinner and they come to the bathroom door so they walk in and the guy says would you like the singing toilet or the glass toilet and the man says I’ll take the singing toiletso the guy walks in to the stall and comes back out and says man do you know how enoying that toilet is all it sings is DO YOU SEE WHAT I SEE!!

A confused nine year old boy goes up to his mother and asks, “Is God male or female?”
After thinking for a moment, his mother responds,”Well God is both male and female.”

This confuses the little boy, so he asks, “Is God black or white?”

“Well, God is both black and white.”

This further confuses the boy so he asks, “Is God gay or straight?”

At this the mother is getting concerned, but answers none the less,

“Honey, God is both gay and straight.”

At this the boy’s face lights up with understanding and he triumphantly asks…

“Is God Michael Jackson?”

Why does Peter Pan fly?

youed be flying to if yuor peter got hit by a pan!

As I was trying to pack for vacation, my 3-year-old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point, she said, “Mom, look at this,” and stuck out two of her fingers.

Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her fingers in my mouth and said, “Mommy is gonna eat your fingers!” pretending to eat them before I rushed out of the room again.

When I returned, my daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face and tears down her face.

I said, “What’s wrong honey?”

Sad and broken up she looked at me and said -
“Mommy, where’s my booger?