Every time an Indian walks into the chief’s teepee he sees
the chief masturbating. They finally realize this is a
serious problem, so they fix him up with a nice woman, and
she starts living with him in his teepee.

One day, one of the Indians walks into to chief’s teepee and
there’s the chief masturbating again.

He says, “Chief, what are you doing? We fix you up with a
beautiful woman.”

The chief says, “Her arm get tired.”

Two liberal sociologists were walking down the street when
they came across a bloody man lying at the curb. He is
covered with cuts and bruises from a terrible mugging.

One turned to the other and said, “Whoever did this terrible
deed really needs our help.”

A Navy Chief Dies And Goes To Heaven. Pope John Paul dies of old
age and finds himself at the gates of Heaven at 0300. He knocks on
the gate and a very sleepy-eyed watchman opens the gate and asks,
“Wadda you want?” “I’m the recently deceased Pope and have done
63 years of godly works and thought I should check in here.” The
watchman checks his clipboard and says, “I ain’t got no orders for
you here, just bring your stuff and we’ll sort this out in the
morning.”
They go to an old WWII barracks, 3rd floor, open bay. All the bottom
racks are taken and all empty lockers have no doors. The Pope stows
his gear under a rack and climbs into an upper bunk. The next morning
he awakens to sounds of cheering and clapping. He goes to the window
and sees a flashy Jaguar convertible parading down the clouds from
the golden headquarters building.
The cloudwalks are lined with saints and angels cheering and tossing
confetti. In the back seat sits a Navy Chief, his Submarine Dolphins
glistening on his chest, a cigar in his mouth, a can of San Miguel in
one hand, and his other arm around a voluptuous blonde Angel with
magnificent halos.
This disturbs the Pope and he runs downstairs to the Master-at-Arms
shack and says, “Hey, what gives? You put me, the Pope with 63 years
of godly deeds, in an open bay barracks, while this Chief who must’ve
committed every sin known and unknown to man is staying in a mansion
on the hill and getting a hero’s welcome. How can this be?
The Master at Arms calmly looks up and says, “We get a Pope up here
every 20 or 30 years, but we’ve never had a Navy Chief before.