A traveling salesman’s car breaks down on a deserted road, and
he seeks refuge from the evening storm at a nearby farmhouse.
The farmer, being a kindly soul, says to the man that he can
spend the night and they’ll sort his car out in the morning.
“There’s only one small problem,” says the farmer, “We don’t
have much room, so y’all will have to either sleep on the couch,
or share the spare bedroom with Baby.”
Thoughts of middle-of-the-night crying, early-morning nappy
changing and all those other unpleasant things that come with
sharing a room with a strange baby spring to mind, so the salesman
agrees to sleep on the couch.
The next morning, he walks into the kitchen in the hopes of scoring
some breakfast, and he sees this absolutely stunning, longlegs
redhead, dressed in just a silk negligee, busy making coffee.
She turns around when he walks in and coos: “Hi, I’m Baby, who are
you?”
He replies: “I’m the stupid @!*&@#$ who just spent the whole of
last night alone on the couch!!”

A young fireman placed a ladder against the bedroom window of a burning
house and rushed up. Inside was a curvy brunette in a see- through
nightie.

“Aha,” said he, “you’re the second pregnant girl I’ve rescued this
year!”

“But I’m not pregnant,” the brunette indignantly exclaimed.

“You’re not rescued yet either.”

A resident in a posh hotel breakfast room called over the head
waiter one morning and said with a wonderful and cheerful smile.

“Good Morning sir. What a wonderful morning I’d like two boiled
eggs, one of them so under cooked it’s runny, and the other so
over cooked it’s tough and hard to eat. Also, grilled bacon that
has been left out so it gets a bit on the cold side; burnt toast
that crumbles away as soon as you touch it with a knife; butter
straight from the deep freeze so that it’s impossible to spread;
and a pot of very weak coffee, lukewarm.”

“That’s a complicated order sir,” said the bewildered waiter. “It
might be quite difficult.”

The guest replied, “Oh? I don’t understand — that’s what I got
yesterday!”