From the law offices of Johnnie Cochran, Esq, here are the top
proposed closing arguments in the matter of United States Vs
Bill Clinton:

* If the dress ain’t a mess, he won’t need to confess!

* The economy’s great, let the white boy skate!

* If the bitch didn’t spit, you must aquit!

* If she is not spread eagle, then it’s not illegal!

* Lewinsky’s a whore, and Bill’s better than Gore!

* So he lied to the masses, he was just saving some asses!

* He cheats on his wife, but it’s his personal life!

* Bill won’t tell the truth until he sees Ken Starr’s proof!

* Bill is not sleazy, Lewinsky’s just easy!

* If the sex is just oral, it’s not really immoral!