KIDS JOKES 6….
Q. What do you call a no eyed deer?
A. No idea!
Q: What do you get when you cross a radio and a
refrigerator?
A: Very cool music!
Q: How do you make a comedian fall down?
A: You knock-knock him out.
Q: Why did the computer have a fever?
A: It had a virus.
Q: How many skunks does it take to smell up a house?
A: A phew!
Q. Why did the spider cross the road?
A. To get to her web site.
Q. How do you catch a squirrel?
A. Run up to the tree and act like a nut.
Q. How do you know there’s an elephant in the bathtub with you?
A. You can smell the peanuts on his breath.
Q. What is black and white and red all over?
A. A baby skunk in red flannel pajamas.
An embarrassed zebra.
A newspaper.
A MAN TAKES HIS AILING PONY TO THE VET
–THE VET SAYS HE’LL BE OK–HE JUST A LITTLE HORSE
THE FREEZER BURNED PARROT
Once there was this man wh owned a parrot, the bird sat on a
pirch in the living room. The man had friends over quite often.
Then one day the parrot started swearig at his guests. The man
warned the bird ” be quiet or else i’ll shove you into the
freezer. The next time the man had guests over the bird did
the same thing, so after everyone left he shoved the bird into
the freezer. Then after about 10 or so minutes the man became
guilty and concerned so he opened the freezer to let the bird
out. The bird came out from behind the ice and asked “what did
the chicken do?”
Frog who wants a loan
A frog walks into a bank. A woman named Patricia Wack walks
up to him and asks if she can help him.
“Yeah,” He says. “I need a loan for my lily pad.
Patricia Wack doesn’t know what to do, so she goes and gets
her manager. “If you want a loan,” the manager says, “then
you must give us collateral.”
“What’s that?” the frog asks.
“It’s a knick knack. You have to bring it in case you don’t
pay your loan.” He says.
The next day the frog comes back and gives Patricia Wack a
little ceramic cat.
“What is that?” she asks.
The manager who was standing nearby says, “It’s a knick knack
Patty Wack, give that frog a loan!”
Pets
A man exits the Animal competition, having his Great Dane
wearing the blue ribbon for Champion. He stands at the
corner, waiting for his limozine to arrive. A young boy
walks up, a strange yellow dog on a lease as his pet. The
man, annoyed at the boy and this strange dog, tells him to
go down to the other corner. The boy sticks out his tongue.
The man gets angry and yells at his dog to attack the other
dog. The Great Dane jumps at the yellow dog. The yellow dog
catches the Great Dane’s legs in its mouth, hurls the dog
into the air. The man is in shock! “What kind of
dog is that, anyway!” The little boy answers,”Well, before
I cut off his tail and painted him yellow, he was an aligator!”
Kid Songs
No one can fracture a Christmas carol better than a kid.
Sing along with these new takes on old favorites:
Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly
We three kings of porridge and tar
On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me
Later on we’ll perspire, as we dream by the fire.
He’s makin a list, chicken and rice.
Noel. Noel, Barney’s the king of Israel.
With the jelly toast proclaim
Olive, the other reindeer.
Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say
Sleep in heavenly peas
In the meadow we can build a snowman, Then pretend that he
is sparse and brown
You’ll go down in listerine
Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay
O come, froggy faithful
You’ll tell Carol, “Be a skunk, I require”
Good tidings we bring to you and your kid
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