MID LIFE….
Mid-life is when you go to the doctor and you realize you now have to
pay someone to look at you naked.
Mid-life women no longer have upper arms, we have wingspans…we are no
longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.
Mid-life has hit you when you stand naked in front of a mirror and can
see your rear end without turning around.
You know you’ve crossed the mid-life threshold when you’re in the
grocery store, and you hear a Muzak version of “Stairway to Heaven” in
the produce department.
Mid-life is when you bounce (a lot), but you don’t bounce back ~ it’s
more like Splat!
Mid-life is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a tube top
and scream, “Listen, honey, even the Roman Empire fell, and those things
will too!
Mid-life can bring out your angry, bitter side. You look at your
latte-swilling, beeper-wearing know-it-all teenager and think, “For this
I have stretch marks?’
Mid-life is when your memory really starts to go. The only thing you
still retain is water.
You become more reflective in mid-life. You start pondering such
questions as; what is life all about, why am I here, how much Healthy
Choice ice cream can I eat before it’s no longer a healthy choice?
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