Speaking of “Microsoft,” here are a few strains of virus’ in the image
of the famous I love you virus…

— The “Little Virus Of The Evening” virus will do anything to your
computer–if you’re willing to pay the right price.

— The “Stalker” virus spends unnatural amounts of time
monitoring your computer, collecting data your computer has
thrown away and trying to record its most intimate functions.

— The “Happily Married” virus invades only one computer and
stays with it for life.

— The “Unhappily Married” virus spends a long time negotiating
with a computer, finally invades it, and then strays to other
computers from time to time.

— The “I Can’t Commit” virus hangs around a computer for a long
time and frequently sends messages that it intends to invade, but
is really just interested in playing with your computer’s data.