THE LAW
* The Law of Common Sense
Never accept a drink from a urologist.
* The Law of Reality
Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
* The Law of Self Sacrifice
When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.
* The Law of Volunteering
If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead.
* The Law of Avoiding Oversell
When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.
* The Law of Motivation
Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.
* Boob’s Law
You always find something in the last place you look.
* Weiler’s Law
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn’t have to do it himself.
* Law of Probable Dispersal
Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
* Law of Volunteer Labor
People are always available for work in the past tense.
* Conway’s Law
In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.
* Iron Law of Distribution
Them that has, gets.
* Law of Cybernetic Entomology
There is always one more bug.
* Law of Drunkenness
You can’t fall off the floor.
* Heller’s Law
The first myth of management is that it exists.
* Osborne’s Law
Variables won’t; constants aren’t.
* Weinberg’s Second Law
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would have destroyed civilization.
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