I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate
yourself in public.

It sounds like English, but I can’t understand a word
you’re saying.

I can see your point, but I still think you’re full of
it.

I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don’t give a
damn.

I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

Thank you. We’re all refreshed and challenged by your
unique point of view.

What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely
ceremonial.

And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be…?

Do I look like a people person?

This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent
lighting.

Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.

Can I trade this job for what’s behind door #1?

How do I set a laser printer to stun?