WOMEN ARE WONDERFUL….
Everyday I give thanks to God
I have two mounds upon my bod
I shave my legs, I sit down to pee
I can justify any shopping spree
Not to a barber, but a beauty salon
Can get a massage without a hard on
Can balance the checkbook, pump my own gas
Can talk to my friends about the size of my ass
I always save money by using coupons
Can admit to others when I am wrong
Don’t drive in circles at any cost
So I don’t have to admit when I am lost
Don’t act like I’m in a timed marathon
Everytime I go to the john
I spend two hours preparing for a date
Only to find you’re two hours late
I don’t watch movies with lots of gore
Don’t need instant replay to remember the score
I won’t lose my hair, I don’t get jock itch
And just cause I’m assertive don’t call me a bitch
I don’t wear the same underwear everyday
The food in my fridge has no sign of decay
I don’t go to Sears to look at the tools
I don’t cheat at poker, I follow the rules
I don’t smoke cigars
Don’t pay for drinks at bars
I don’t punch my friends just to say Hi
And it’s o.k. for me to cry
I know all you men
Think that you’re IT
But compared to a woman
You just ain’t SHIT!
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